I Gained Some... {Weigh in Wednesday}

Something happened to me recently. I'm not sure what to call it, or how to even describe it.

I think I got a little bit of self love.

Huh. Didn't expect that!

Apparently, when you treat your body right by feeding it well and moving a lot, you not only lose weight, but you find yourself a little more confident.

I don't imagine many people know this, but I'm not exactly what you would call the model of confidence. I had been stuck in a self destructive cycle for years, and not once in that time, not even on my wedding day, could I look in the mirror and say I liked what I saw. At all.

I've tried to boost my confidence by telling myself it's not about looks. Which it's not. But it is about health. Which I wasn't grasping either. I would choose a part of myself and say, I really like that about myself. Usually it was my forearm or feet or something. I suppose that was a start but I didn't know what else to do.

So, what happened?

I don't really know, but this past weekend, Casey and I went to Moncton for the night, and did a bit of shopping. We actually went back to Saint John early on Sunday and I noticed that Le Chateau was having a big sale, so I thought we should go in and see if I could find a dress for the cruise in Jan, since most of my cocktail dresses are too big now.

There's the first thing. I wanted to go dress shopping?! Say WHAT?!?! Can I just say, never in my entire life have I wanted to go put on a dress, let alone a cocktail dress. I've always hated my legs. I have rather huge calfs, I have since I was little. Even in high school, at 120-130 my calfs were huge. When I picked out my prom dress, I didn't want to try them on. When I went wedding dress shopping, I was sure I was an elephant squeezed into a dress.

Second of all, I actually picked out dresses and tried them on. I usually procrastinate until January, just before we fly south to look for one because I hate shopping so much. I would normally go in, see the pretty dresses, be sure they would look horrid on me, and leave a little broken hearted. Not this time. I found dresses in my favourite colours. I tried ones that Casey picked out for me (unless they looked like they belonged at JR Prom). I only found 4 that I wanted to try, but that's much better than normal!

AND can I just say, that while looking, the lady working there offered to help, and asked what size and I said I wasn't sure, Med or Large probably, depending on the dress. She said "You look like a medium." My heart almost exploded. She has no idea how good that felt.

It's hard to believe that my mind is actually changing for the better. Changing your body is one thing, but beginning to love yourself? That's a whole other struggle. I'd like to think I'm on the right path.




The two on the left are 10 months ago. The right is my shopping trip. I bought the top right for 40$! Yay sales!

Moving on to Weigh in Wednesday with Heather, Ash and Erin!


Weigh In Wednesday
This week I gained 0.4 pounds. I'm not totally happy about that but seeing that I was away for 2 days and ate pretty freely I'll take it. I did have a couple high calories days during the week too so I shouldn't be surprised. I'm really hoping for better results next week. 


Height: 5'3"
Last Week: 163.6
This Week: 164.0
Change: +0.4 Pounds
Total Loss: 46.2 Pounds

I am really trying to get my snacking under control. This has been an ongoing issue for me. My meals are fine but I need to watch my snacks. Especially at night. Like last night. That wasn't good. The thing is, by 6 PM, I had eaten 3 meals, and I thought they were good meals! An egg white omlette for breakfast, a taco salad (no meat) for lunch, and hamburger soup for supper. Guess what? 800ish calories isn't going to cut it for me. Not if I'm working out and chasing a child around and keeping a house in order. Our bodies NEED calories, and yesterday I didn't get enough, so you know what happened? I binged on junk to try and satisfy myself. I didn't have anything too crazy, some teddy grahams and dark chocolate and rice cake chips, but still. Thankfully I didn't totally blow my calorie goal, and I still worked out and drank lots of water. 

In attempt to try to find ideas, I reached out in a group I'm in on FB, and I got the idea from another Beachbody coach to pre plan/pre portion my snacks daily. I basically have my meals pre planned so why not my snacks too? This could make a big difference for me. So, I got all of todays food ready to go last night, and even tracked it in MFP to make sure it wasn't too much or too little. I hope it goes well. 

I think I'm going to try drinking Shakeology at night sometimes too. I actually like the taste and if I have something sweet I'm not nearly as likely to go scavenging for food in the cupboard.

Comments

  1. You look amazing! And yay!!! Gaining a little self love is HUGE! It was kinda all at once for me too. Like BAM! I don't hate myself! lol. I am so proud of you and that dress is gorgeous!!

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  2. Rock on, mama! You look smashing in those dresses!

    For a late night snack, I keep sweet cereals around like maple shredded mini wheat. Then my sweet tooth is satisfied and I don't kill my day. Or high protein fruit shakes. Super filling because you can add water and ice, but not too bad on the calorie side of things :)

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    1. I wish I was a cereal lover! That would be a good idea!

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  3. If it's under a pound gain it doesn't count (under a pound losses always count LOL)!

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  4. OK so I skipped over everything after the dresses as I just had to tell you how excited I am for you that you are starting to love yourself and HELLO you went into Le Chateau knowing that you could fit into one of their dresses. And then the sales clerk told you that you where a MEDIUM are you kidding me. WAY TO GO GIRL!
    Okay, so maybe it's just me and where I live, but the last time I went into Le Chateau, all their dresses looked like they where meant for someone weighing in around the 120 mark and that was for a large. So I'm super excited for you that you found a dress and that you where a medium there. For me that is a HUGE milestone.
    Okay, now to read the rest of the post.

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    1. I've bought dresses there before, always a LG or XL but I've never felt good about wearing one. This time it's different and I'm so happy about that! Thanks!

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  5. Sorry to hear about the gain, but really 0.4 is not that much and it will melt away next week. I so totally get the calorie thing, I cut meat out of my diet last February and I've been struggling to get my daily calories ever since. The worst part for me is that if I don't get near my daily calorie intake for the day my body starts holding onto the fat, but then if I just eat anything I feel like crap. I need to start planning better. So we can both work on the planning thing. :)

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    1. Thanks! I think it's always going to be a struggle for me!

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  6. Look at you all cute and sassy in those dresses :) Love that you are loving yourself!!

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  7. Oh man. This post makes me feel sooo happy!! When I stopped caring about the looks and weight...basically when I stopped stressing--the weight came off. It was so cool.

    Keep being awesome, so proud of you!!!!!

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  8. The teal one shoulder looks FANTASTIC! Wow, lady! HOT STUFF!!!! :)

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