Deep Breath.... {Weigh in Wednesday}

I've had this blog post written in the back of my head for months and months. I kept telling myself, 'not yet, maybe at the next goal.' On one hand, it's like I didn't want people to know how much I weighed. On the other, this weight goal has been something I've strived towards doing for the past little while.

I've been blogging about weight loss for around 7 months, and not once have I dared to post my weight. I suppose that I am embarrassed about how high I let it get, especially during my pregnancy.

Then, on one Weigh in Wednesday, Heather over at Pretty Strong Medicine showed immense courage, and began posting her weight to her blog. She inspired me to actually build up the courage to do the same. That was around 10 pounds ago.

So, I should start from the beginning.

To be quite honest, I can't really tell you how much I weighed when I graduated high school. I'm going to guess around 135-140. I didn't really struggle with my weight in high school, but I did become aware of it. I think I may have gotten up to 150 lbs in high school once, but I just cut out junk food and lost it no problem. I've always had large legs, so you won't see too many photos of me showing off my legs.

June 2006
135-140 maybe? This was my prom. How adorable. Haha. That dress was a size 8.

June 2007
So, I went to university. I gained around 40 pounds. All in my first year. Give or take a bit. It was my entire lifestyle. I didn't party, actually. I read my textbooks, and punished rewarded myself with junkfood. Cookies, chocolate, candy. Late night chinese takeout. Evening trips to Dairy Queen. That, plus not moving nearly enough, caused it. I'm not exactly sure, but I would say I'd be around 175-180 here. Oh, and if you're wondering, there is a wet spot on her croc that came from her saving my life by squishing a gigantic spider at a music festival. 

That summer, I worked with the lady that ran Weight Watchers here on the island. She mentored me and helped me out by giving me food scales, and program books. I had never done it before, but it was super simple and I could do it with my lifestyle. 

Summer 2008
 This is the next summer, after a whole summer of actually going to Weight Watchers meetings and doing awesome on the program. I got down to 168 before I went back to school. I didn't have the money to keep going to meetings, so I ended up stopping, thinking I'd just do it on my own anyway, since I'd lost 20 lbs, and was obviously an expert by then.

Christmas 2008
Oh look, I'm not an expert. I pretty much gained everything back that I lost by Christmas. Boooo!!!


July 2009
 I don't think I was really doing anything about my weight at this point. I basically ignored my weight for like 2 years. Mostly, the last 2 years of university until just after I got married. I think I was around 180 in this photo. Ugh. And I got on that barrel and slid down a pole trying to capture a flag in front of all those people plus way more...Good land. No, I didn't get it.


August 2010
Our wedding day. Weighing in at 196. I think I'm the only bride in history to not even remotely attempt to lose weight before her wedding day. What was I thinking?! My dress is either a 14 but the back (thankfully) had a lace up, and I was reaching the end of my laces.


October 2011
Heidi and I at work on Halloween night! Pretty much the most awesome thing ever. Anyway, I had been working hard on Weight Watchers for several months by this point. I believe I was around 185 ish here. I got on their internet forums and began leading a monthly challenge group to keep myself motivated. I did that for a year or so.

Feb 2012
That's me in the green. Ha. Just kidding! This is my lowest weight in a long time. 175 pounds when we took our cruise on the Oasis. Just after this, we decided to begin trying for a baby. I left Weight Watchers and totally stopped caring what I ate. I decided that if I was going to get pregnant and gain 30 pounds, what was the point anyway? Hindsight is 20/20. Ugh. 

August 2012
Aaaannnd I'm 12 weeks pregnant here. Back to 195. All that hard work, undone in less than 6 months.

Jan 2013
 Obviously I'm the blue whale on the left. I have a photo of myself just after this, but you can see my bra, so I thought I'd spare you. Here's a little perspective. The lovely lady on the right is my sister in law, Sable, who delivered her child, right on time, 12 days after me. Doesn't she have the cutest little belly!? Anyway, I'm not exactly sure, because it was too depressing to look at the scale by the end of it, but I feel like my last OB appointment weighed me in at 238. Before getting pregnant, I had never been over 200 in my life. I wasn't proud of myself. Thankfully, I only gained around 40 pounds during my pregnancy. Facepalm.


March 5, 2013
About a month after delivering Harper, I weighed in at 210.

August 2013
This was a photoshoot done for Harpers 6 month birthday. I hadn't really done much by way of weight loss, other than I basically walked every single day that was fit during the summer. I think I was around 204.

January 2014
I kicked it into gear in September-October of 2013. I began paying more attention to what I was eating and actually started going to women's hockey. This photo was taken on our cruise this year, and I believe I weighed 194. 

After our cruise, I began logging my food into MyFitnessPal (add me, I'm winterbenson). I joined a dietbet and lost 6 ish pounds. After that, I kept up a slow and mostly steady weight loss. I had a bit of a plateau around 180, but now I'm thankfully past that. I bought myself a FitBit Flex and began actually monitoring my activity every day, instead of just guessing at it. I now reward myself every 5 pounds, so that I can always keep myself motivated.

So, let's move on to this weeks Weigh in Wednesday with Heather, Ash, and Erin.


Weigh In Wednesday

This week I weigh in at 173.6. That is down 2 pounds from last week and a total of 36.4 pounds since March 31, 2013. And a total of 64.4 pounds since my last OB appointment at the end of my pregnancy.  This is my lowest weight in 2 1/2 years. I'm really proud of myself, and how far I've come. I really feel that I actually have my head in it this time, and that I'm making sustainable changes to live with for the rest of my life. I still have quite a bit to do, but I can already see and feel changes that I love. I feel better. I even look better, which I can't even seem to wrap my head around. My clothes are all too big (can you say shopping trip?!). I am starting to be able to love myself, my body, and what it is capable of.



Height: 5'3"
Last Week: 175.6
This Week: 173.6
Change: -2 pounds
Total Loss: 36.4 pounds


Thank you for all of your words of encouragement. They really keep me going every week! Also, thank you to those who have met me on the road, at the store, at the hospital, or wherever and offered encouraging words as well. I really appreciate that!


Comments

  1. LOVE LOVE LOVED this entry. It was so nice to hear your story and get to know you a bit better. I TOTALLY feel you on the University struggle and the ups and downs of weight loss.

    Thank you for posting this Winter. You should know you're totally not alone in your struggles and I'm so happy I found you! We'll be cheerleaders for each other. YOU ROCK! :)

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    1. Thank you! I really enjoy following your blog! I wish we lived closer, because we could totally be real life fitness buddies!

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  2. I have been blogging a little less than a year myself and a couple of months ago I let go of the secret and posted my weight. It is such a scary feeling but everyone has been so supportive. You are doing awesome, keep up the hard work!

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    1. Thank you! It was hard, and took a whole lot of talking myself into, but it's out there now! :)

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  3. Great loss this week!! Thanks for sharing your story. You are awesome for facing your fears and conquering them! Keep up the great work!

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    1. Thank you! And thank you for reading! :)

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  4. So proud of you for being brave and posting the numbers! It's scary, but it's such a help to me when I do it. You'll get there my dear!

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    1. Thank you :) It was scary, but I'm glad I did it!

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  5. Yep, I am another weight hider. I am sure I will confess in time, but just not ready. Way to be brave! You are doing so great :)

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    1. Thank you. Wait until you're more comfortable with it, but I have to say, everyone has been more than supportive. I've received several facebook messages with kind words from people in my town. It's been really nice.

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  6. You are doing AMAZING! I am so proud of you, Winter! :) And no, you are not the only bride in history to not try to lose weight before your wedding. I definitely didn't!!! Congratulations on your continued successes!

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    1. oh PHEW! I'm glad I'm not totally alone on that one! haha! Thank you!!

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  7. Thank you for the shoutout, Winter! It took me FOREVER to post my weight and once I did, it was liberating. I hope you experience the same freedom from the scale now that it's out...I think you'll find you start to care more about how you FEEL and how your clothes fit instead of the pesky old scale.

    So proud of you and your hard work and I'm glad you continue to link up week to week! Hugs to you for a great week :)

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    1. Thank YOU for inspiring me! I've been trying to work up to it ever since you posted about it!

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  8. Way to go! Congrats on your loss. And Congrats on being #1 on my fitbit friends list... yet again!

    You look beautiful in EVERY picture... no matter what you weigh.

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    1. Thanks! My goal is 10 000 steps at least every day this month! It is sometimes a challenge, especially when the weather sucks, but I try my hardest!

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  9. Congrats on that AWESOME loss! I totally get that feeling of being terrified to post your weight. In the end, I figured out that I was scared of what people would say, but I realized that no one could say anything that I hadn't already said to myself. It's definitely freeing!

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    1. You are SO right! In fact, I'm probably 10x more critical of myself than others are of me! Thank you for reading!

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  10. Great job in taking the step to share your weight. It's hard at first but there's a whole community of support rallying around you! You've got this!!

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    1. Thank you! You're right, everyone has been amazingly supportive! I'm not sure where I would be without this linkup!!

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  11. So honest and real!! It's funny how we can be so controlled by a number!! You are doing so great and I loved this post!!

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  12. What a dramatic transformation since having Harper! A shopping trip is your reward for the hard work you've put in.

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  13. Way to go Winter! I hope soon, I'll be where you are and ready to share. You look great!!!

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    1. It took a long time, good luck! Thank you!

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  14. Thank you for putting yourself out there Winter! It has been truly inspiring to see how hard you've been working :) Keep up the hard work!

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  15. You are so brave and vulnerable in this post and that is what I love. Thank you. Thank you for being real, for being realistic, and saying it like it is. Love it!

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    1. Thank you! I felt like I really put myself out there with this post, but I was glad I did it, in the end. I've gone on to lose more since this post, too! Thanks for reading!

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  16. Wow this is so inspiring! The way you shared your journey had me hooked, I felt like I was watching a movie. Many congrats with your weight loss! I'm visiting from the SITS girls and I'm happy to have found such an inspiration in you and your blog! :)

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  17. Way to go Winter! Keep at it :-) I think you look beautiful in every of the above pictures though :-)

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