Defining Your Parenting 'Style'?

Ever since I got pregnant (and even some before), I have been hearing/reading about different and conflicting 'parenting styles.'

To be quite honest, I am a fairly judgemental person myself. I'd never let it effect how I treated you, because I think 'we're all in this together', but secretly, I'd be laughing about some weird thing you do.


I'm pretty sure we all do it.

At least I'm admitting it.

So, I guess that some parenting styles even begin before a child is born, or even conceived  Some parents are super vigilant in getting their vitamins and preparing their bodies for the conception of a baby. Taking vitamins, meditating, exercising.


I'm not one of those people. I bought Folic Acid when we started to try to conceive. I was to forgetful to take it. Oh well.

Jeez, you could have set an alarm on your iPhone, Winter!

No thanks.

Some parents prepare a detailed birth plan, that even dictates what they can eat when they're in labour. Some prepare a playlist of music that they want to listen to during labour. That would probably have been nice. I knew about it, but I didn't do it. If I needed music that badly, I could have turned on my iPhone and rocked out between contractions.

"I'm comin' out, I want the world to know..."


Some say that they are NOT having pain medication, EVER! I know the risks and benefits of having pain medication. I know that you risk having an allergic reaction during one of the most stressful events of your life. I know that Morphine is long acting and is best when your baby won't be here within 4 hours. I know that Fentanyl is very short acting, and is best when you're expecting your little one soon. I know that any pain medication that they give you can surpress respiratory drive in your newborn, and they can (and in my case did) come out not breathing. How could anyone do that to their body or their baby?!

Me. I could.

Once the child is born, there is a thing called "delayed cord clamping," which has proved to decrease anemia in babies. I was on board for this theory, but guess what? All that pain medication I got meant my baby came out not breathing. Delayed cord clamping was not an option. Casey was lucky though, the Dr wasn't panicing and let him cut the cord.

Then, some parents are all "NO VITAMIN K, NO ERYTHRO EYE DROPS, NO HEP B!" My baby got all of those things, she didn't need them, but I wanted her to have them. I plan on traveling with my baby, so Hep B was a good plan. The risks of getting vitamin K are far less than the risks of not getting it. The erytho eye drops were just an added bonus. I don't have herpes, so she didn't really need it, but whatever.

When it comes to diapering, some parents are super hardcore cloth diapering fanatics. "NO sposies will ever touch my baby's skin!" We are actually cloth diapering Harper. Casey wanted to do it to save money in the long run. I think they're cute.

Oh right, save the trees and all that.

We were in the hospital for almost 5 full days. We couldn't possibly have cloth diapered that whole time. We were staying in a hostle with no shower, sleeping on cots. You can bet there wasn't anywhere to wash our diapers. We did bring a couple to the hospital with us, but they were just for pictures, and ended up being way too big anyway.

Once it actually comes to parenting your child, there are several trains of thought. I would like to think there is good in all of them. Why do I need to be an attachment or non-attachment parent? I like to wear my baby some, but that doesn't mean I am an attachment parent. I like the idea of crying it out. I'm going to give my baby her immunizations.

I don't co-sleep because I seriously think it would be a hazard to her health in our bed. I do, however have her sleeping in our room. I just think its safer and easier at this point. If you co-sleep, great, I hope it works for you!

 I sort of wanted to breast feed, I realize breast is best, but it just didn't happen for us. I honestly think I'm better for it. We're both sleeping through the night. I did try the exclusive pumping thing, but due to unforeseen circumstances, that didn't work out for long, and I hated it. I found every single second attached to that pump absolutely miserable!!

So I stopped.

Happy mama, happy baby right?

One thing I am finding has really worked for us, and I would highly recommend, is reading Healthy Sleeping Habits, Happy Child. Don't get me wrong, Harper is only 6 weeks old. We're not hardcore sleep training her. BUT, we did find that, on the advice of the book, we could put her down drowsy but awake, and she could put herself to sleep. She does it pretty well every night now. She has been sleeping through the night pretty consistently for almost 3 weeks.

I know. Hate me. It's fine.

At least I'm sleeping.

I really think that the mommy wars need to stop. You can be as crunchy as they come or you can be the opposite. Seriously, we're all in this together. This 'parenting' thing. Wouldn't it be a lot easier if we just did what works best for ourselves and our babies, and let others do the same?

Don't get me wrong. I'm still gonna secretly laugh at some of the weird things people do. But, if it works for them, and makes them happy, I'm happy for them. I'm not going to force my opinions on anyone. I'm a nurse, so no one usually listens to my opinion anyway, unless it also comes from a doctor.

Then they listen.


{This post is part of Baby Talk.}


  1. Thanks for linking up girl! It really is crazy all the different opinions out there. Sometimes us mamas just need to do what we can to survive. :)

  2. Found you through Baby Talk! I'm expecting my first baby in September & this made me laugh out loud.


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